What a weekend.
Friday was fun. It didn't start out fun though. It was mostly just me sat in my room not doing much. I was content though to spend the evening printing off research for my mask project and annotating it.
At about 4pm though, I decided to go and buy some new clothes and bought two nice tshirts. I then decided that since I was now out in town, I would try my best to explore the whole of it and I ended up walking around the whole circumference of it and managed to get back onto my road without getting lost once. It felt like an achievement.
When I got back, I looked at my watch to see that it was now 6pm and suddenly I realised that I had supposed to have been there at 5pm to talk to our student rep person. Damn. Ahmed said that he would be there, but he wasn't either. Neither was Gulu.
Gulu arrived home though about 10 minutes after I did and said that a girl named Sarah had been and gone and that she had asked us to fill out a form, just stating our name, room number and if we're registered with a doctor.
I wrote my name and then Gulu wrote his except he didn't write Gulu. In fact, he didn't write anything like Gulu.
He wrote 'Anil'.
"Hold on", I said to him, "That's your name?"
"Yes"
"Not Gulu?"
"What?"
"Isn't your name Gulu?"
"No, my name is Anil", he said and pointed to what he'd written. Sure enough, it was Anil. Pronounced aNeil.
"I thought your name was Gulu!", surprised and confused why Ahmed calls him that. I then worried that maybe I'd been insulting him or something in Indian without even knowing it!
Around 9:20pm, I text Kerry to see what she was up to. She said she was incredibly bored. I suggested she go out to Brannigan's, but she said she didn't want to on her own. I then asked if she was up for going the Bouverie for a drink and she said yes so I got ready and by 9:50pm, I was with Kerry walking to the bar. We also picked up Mitch on the way.
Though there was only three of us, it was a fun night. We talked about various things and didn't leave the Bouverie until just after midnight.
From there, we went to get something to eat and ended up spending a good hour or so talking on a street corner again about random stuff. Mitch went home after a while leaving me and Kerry to continue chatting away.
It was weird. It was now around 1am but neither of us were particularly tired or wanting to go home so we ended up just talking for ages. I was happy to do so as it meant more 'bonding time' between me and Kerry. And I mean in a purely platonic sense.
Kind of.
It must have been around 2am before I offered to walk her home. We continued talking as we walked and I learnt a lot about her past and how she loves travelling and how she's eaten all sorts of weird food and how she likes horse riding. Just general life history stuff that I was more than willing to listen to.
Once at her house, the chatting still didn't stop. We just kept talking. One topic led to another and the conversation was very fluid and fun. It's quite surreal though standing outside at 2:10am on a deserted foggy street talking to someone like it was the middle of the day. It was nice, though.
I didn't end up leaving her until just after 3am. I found it pretty cool that we'd been talking pretty much non stop since midnight. I don't think I've ever had such a long conversation with someone and not felt like it was dragging on. It was great.
I decided to get a cab home and gave her a hug and said goodnight.
The next day, I awoke knowing that in just a few hours, I would be going on a date. I was both excited and nervous.
I talked to Ahmed about the Gulu/Anil thing. He said Gulu was a nickname but he failed to give me a reason why it was a nickname.
I will call Gulu Anil from now on.
I got ready to go into town to buy a flexible tape measure to measure my head for the mask. Just as I was getting ready, my Mum called me and asked if I could put �50 worth of lottery tickets on for Gary. He does it every week. I think it's silly. I don't think he can win enough every week to justify spending �50 on it. Regardless, I said yes.
I headed for Tescos to buy some toilet rolls. On my way there, Kerry text me asking where I wanted to meet. I had forgotten that I was supposed to be meeting her because she was going shopping in Tesco too. I said I was on my way there now and I'd wait for her. She text back saying that she and Mitch were going for food first and asked if I was coming so I said yes.
We had a meal together in a pub and by the time we got out, it was 5pm. I kept looking at my watch, nervous, making sure I had enough time to get to the station to go and meet Claire in Liverpool.
We went into Tescos after the pub to buy whatever. I only needed some toilet rolls and some Sprite but I wanted to pay it on my card so I entered my pin number once at the checkout.
It didn't work.
"Can you try again please?", the cashier said. So, I did.
It didn't work.
"Sorry, it's still not working", he said, "Do you have another way of paying?"
"Try it again", I said and he obliged, trying it again and me entering my pin number. It still didn't work.
"That is definitely the right number", I said to him.
"I can get someone over if you want me to?", he asked me.
"I'll pay with cash", I said and managed to scrounge the �3 or so I had in change to pay for the items. It was all the money I had on me.
Since I apparantly could not pay for anything with my card, it meant that paying for the lottery tickets was out of the question as I did not have �50 on me. I went outside to the cash machine.
"The balance of your account is �500", the machine read. "Today you may withdraw �000.00"
"What the fuck?", I said out loud to Kerry and Mitch standing by me. They had a look and were just as confused.
"I can't even go the bank and sort it out", I said, "It's Sunday", along with the fact that it was also now 6pm.
I started to panic. Not only could I not access my money, but I didn't have *any* money on me either. I had less than �2 in change. I was beginning to think that I would have to call Claire and tell her I would have to cancel our date.
As Kerry checked her bank account, I thought about asking her to lend me some money but before I asked, she offered and I gratiously accepted. I asked if she could lend me �40, which she did and I was very very appreciative. The knot in my stomach eased slightly.
After saying goodbye to Kerry and Mitch and thanking Kerry once more for lending me the money, I rushed back to my room to get ready and go to Liverpool. I had planned on being there well before Claire was due to get there, but I had not kept track of the time very well and though my train was at 7pm, I was now rushing about and it was 6:40pm.
I got changed quickly, put my shoes back on and rushed out of the house and by the time I got a cab to the station, it was 6:55pm.
I called Claire just before I was about to buy my ticket to make sure she was still coming. "Yeah, don't worry so much!", she said to me. Of course from a few past experiences, I've become accustomed to making sure that the other person is definitely going to be there.
I bought my ticket and found that my train wasn't due until 7:15pm so I had a little time to relax. I text my Mum, telling her I couldn't put the lottery tickets on for Gary and for her to call me so I could explain why not. I then had another 40 minutes once on the train to relax further.
While on the train, I decided that the best course of action to fix this stupid problem was to call Barclays and ask why the hell could I not withdraw any money out of my account. However, I knew that they had sent me a new password to my Kirkby address for my online banking and I thought that that may have something to do with it. The only option was to go home to Kirkby after meeting Claire and see if there was any mail there for me.
I called my Nan. I had no idea what I would find in the house once I got back. I had no even brought a toothbrush with me. I didn't know if there would be any food or even something simple such as toilet roll! I wanted to call my Nan to make sure she would be in over the weekend so if I needed anything, I could go around the corner to hers.
I did my best to explain everything and she said she'd be in. I called her back a few minutes later to see if she could spare a toilet roll just in case there wasn't any in mine. She then asked if I'd like to just stay at her house instead.
"Er, are you sure?", I asked.
"Yeah, if you want", she replied.
"Oh, ok then. I will."
"Ok, just let me know when you're coming"
"Ok, thanks"
Nice of her. And very much appreciated!
It felt weird arriving in Liverpool just before 8pm. This was the first time I had been back to Liverpool since September 24th when I moved to Chester. It felt good to be in familiar surroundings even if it was just a train station. As I made my way out, I could feel my heart beating faster and faster, the adrenaline pumping and the thoughts of "Will she/won't she like me?" speeding through my head. It's such a horrible feeling and yet it's one of the best feelings of excitement you can have.
I saw Claire standing by a shop and as I approached her, I smiled before giving her a hug. The nervousness was pushed to the back of mind as best as I could and I did my best to be, well, normal.
She looked great. Great eyes, cool hair. Nice voice. I definitely fancied her.
We talked as we made our way to the cinema. It was mostly her talking and me listening but I'm happy to have it that way. She said she was sorry for talking so much and that she does it when she is nervous, but I said I was happy with it.
I paid for the both of us in the cinema. "Are you sure?", she asked me, as I asked for two tickets. "Yeah of course, it's fine", I replied.
We went in the cinema and sat down, talking as the adverts and trailers rolled. Of course, all the time we were talking, I just wanted to give her a big cuddle and kiss her but couldn't just yet. I didn't quite know how.
The film began and over the course of the next hour or so, I tried my best to overcome my nerves and just do something as simple as put my hand on hers. You wouldn't believe how such a simple task seems so hard when you're terrified that maybe she doesn't like you. She wasn't giving off any real signals so it was really hard to tell.
After literally an hour of plucking up the courage, I stroked her arm and she smiled at me but to me it looked like she was just smiling because I had smiled at her, not really because she actually fancied me much.
Confused, I sat there for longer, wondering if I should try something else. I was so nervous, it was unbelievable. I felt like I was frozen.
"I'm just going the toilet", she said to me after an hour or so and she left the cinema to go.
Of course, the last girl who said that to me didn't bloody come back at all!
Needless to say, the entrance to the cinema was where my eyes were looking. Looking for her to return. I didn't care about the film.
I thought maybe she had left me because I wasn't showing enough affection and she thought maybe I didn't like her so she had gone. I was worried!
However, thankfully and to my relief, she returned five minutes later. This was my chance to finally regain my courage and actually be a bit more engaging. So, as she sat down, I put my arm around her but she moved it. Worried, I thought she was going to put it back on my lap and say she didn't like me, but instead, she put it on her knee and her own hand on top of mine. "It hurts my neck", she said, referring to where I had had my hand.
I was relieved though. At least now I was holding her hand. Or rather, she was holding mine.
"What's that?", she whispered to me, pointing to my arm.
"What?"
"That", she said. I already knew she was pointing to the scars but I just didn't want to acknowledge it. Of course what can you say except the truth?
"I used to self harm years ago", I said.
"Oh", she said.
She didn't take it further than that, thankfully and we continued holding each others hands.
We stayed like that for at least another 15 minutes or so until she slouched down a little further in the chair and rest her head against my shoulder. That felt nice. I rest my head against hers. It felt like it was finally getting easier.
Of course what I really wanted to do was kiss her but as I said, she was giving off hardly any signals aside from the fact that she had only just put her head against my shoulder.
I brushed the hair from her forehead and she smiled a little but not to the point where I felt like she was waiting for me to kiss her. Man this was tough.
After a good hour and twenty minutes, I finally decided to take a chance and I kissed her.
She kissed me back.
Mission accomplished.
We kissed for a minute or so, but to me, it didn't seem very, well, passionate? It felt like a "Ah, why not" type of kiss. It just didn't feel like it had any real feeling in it. Maybe it was just me but that is definitely what I felt. I liked kissed her, but it just didn't feel...right. It was a little confused. Here I was kissing a nice girl yet something was wrong and I couldn't put my finger on it.
We kissed again a few minutes later too and then just stroked each others hands throughout the rest of the film. I had wanted to kiss her much much more throughout the whole film but she just didn't give off enough signs that she wanted me to.
After the film, we walked back to the station. The conversation flowed nicely and we definitely had no trouble talking to each other but she just made me really unsure about whether she wanted me to touch/kiss her. Having said that, once out of the cinema, she interlinked her arm with mine and that's how we walked back to the station.
We were both getting the same train home but she was getting off one stop earlier than me. We sat facing each other and I stroked her leg through her jeans. It wasn't that she didn't like it as such, but she didn't really show me that she did. And she definitely didn't, you know, attempt to touch or kiss me back.
We arrived at her station and though we were in the middle of our conversation, I pointed out that this was her stop because she hadn't realised. I gave her a quick hug and kissed her on the cheek and then on the lips too.
"It was nice meeting you", she said, "I'll text you"
"It was nice meeting you as well. I hope I see you again soon.", I replied.
And then she was gone.
A bit of a strange date, really. Not quite "Awesome!" and not quite "Awful!". Just kind of..."Average". I have never had an average date before. They're usually one extreme or the other. Most actually fall into the "Awesome!" category.
I arrived in Kirkby at around midnight and first made my way to my house. It was so weird being home. I quickly went to the toilet before going round to my Nan's and I noticed that there was lots of stuff I didn't recognise in the bathroom and then I noticed that there was a new cover on my Mum's bed.
I didn't have much of a look because I didn't want to keep my Nan up so I went round to hers soon after.
I spent an hour or so talking to her about what had happened with the bank and told her that I may be in Liverpool until Monday when I could go to my branch and sort it out. However, another option was to find Barclays' number and call them in the morning and I knew I had some letters with their number on so I thought I'd do that.
Though I was going to spend the night in my Nan's, she said something along the lines of "You don't have to stay here if you don't want to".
"It's up to you", I said.
"I don't mind", she said.
My Nan has a habit of not being able to say no to anyone and always offering hospitality even when she may not actually want to and I never like to take advantage of this. I thought that maybe her saying that was her way of saying that maybe she might not want me there and so I decided that I'd sleep at mine instead. However, just before I left, she gave me some bread, bacon and milk for something to eat and drink. I thanked her before going back to mine.
It felt like entering a different house in a way, once back at mine. There were lots of things I didn't recognise. I knew that my Mum and Gary had stayed there, but there were one or two new/different home furnishings too, like they were living there. My Nan had told me that they were living there, but my Mum hadn't told me that. It was strange.
I watched TV for an hour or two before going to bed at 3am. I found it really hard to get to sleep though because I was replaying my date and wondering how I'd go about sorting everything with my bank.
The next day, I got up at 1pm and got a shower. It was so weird, yet so nice to be in my own shower and be able to once more have a whole house to myself. The only thing I regretted while being there is that my PC was now all the way back in Chester meaning that though I had net access in my room still, I now had no PC to access the net with! Cruel irony.
I ate the bacon my Nan had gave me and made myself a drink as well. The fridge and the freezer were fully stocked with food. Not food that I had bought either. It was obvious to tell that my Mum and Gary were definitely living there. She had definitely not told me this. I wondered why.
At 3pm or so, I called Barclays. I got through to some crappy call centre in India. I have nothing against Indian people but I, as an English customer just cannot understand the Indian accent first go. I hate it when companies outsource their call centres to other countries. It makes dealing with things as important as banking harder when it should be easier.
Regardless, I explained my situation and tried my best to sound authoratitive when they told me they couldn't transfer money from my e-savings account because I had to do that online. I said I needed them to do it over the phone because I had no money and it was very important. Eventually, after being passed through three people, the problem was solved and, contrary to what I had believed, it was not Barclays fault at all.
It was mine.
On Thursday, I had withdrawn �1500 out of my current account and deposited it into my e-savings account. This was so I could earn more interest on it. However, after speaking to one of the guys on the phone, he told me that my account was currently in debit by �600+ and that had been caused by a payment to "CC Housing".
Chester College Housing.
It was the Uni taking the rent money I owed them!
Of course once the guy said "CC Housing" to me, everything fell into place and I had realised what had happened. The Uni had withdrawn the �1097 I owed them, but I only had �500 in my account so when they withdrew it, my balance was actually -�597, which is why I couldn't withdraw any money on Saturday.
After figuring that part of the problem out and telling them I needed to transfer some funds from my e-savings account to my current account, I was passed to someone else who did it for me. I put �1300 into my current account, bringing the total back up to a nice �703. Much better. No more need to panic.
I went back to my Nan's after that for an hour or so and talked with her about Uni life and also her life before I said I needed to catch my train home. She asked if I needed any money and I said no, it was fine and that I'd withdraw some from a cash machine.
"Here, take this", she said and handed me �20.
"No really", I said, "It's fine!"
"No go on, take it"
I took it, but told her that I'll give it her back in two weeks when I come home again for a week. She also ended up giving me money for the cab to the station.
My Nan is so damn generous. Too generous sometimes and unfortunately, to some people to take advantage of it.
I asked the cab driver to stop off at the cash machine and thankfully, I was able to get some money out. I withdrew �100. �40 for Kerry to pay her back and �60 for me so I can store some of my money in my room, should anything like this happen again.
While waiting in the queue to use the cash machine, who should show up but none other than Lucy, Claire's sister. Crazy. We talked while waiting for the cash machine and agreed it was very weird that she knew me. Such a strange set of occurances this weekend.
I only spoke to her for about five minutes and then got back in my cab and went to the station.
The train ride took me just over an hour and fifteen minutes and from Chester station. I text Claire saying I'd met her sister. She asked what about, but I said nothing. But I also said "It would be great to see you again" at the end of the text. She didn't reply. I'm guessing there's a good chance she doesn't actually want to see me again unless I hear otherwise from her.
I walked home from Chester station in the dark, even though I didn't know the way. I just walked and found my bearings after five minutes.
Just before I got home, I noticed that all the American girls were sitting outside. I so wanted to just chat with them and make friends but I just do not know what to say to them. I walked right past them. I hated that I did.
Once home, Anil was in the kitchen. He was drunk and you could tell. I don't really have time for drunk people so I just did what I had to do, got a drink and left him to it before coming up here to write this entry.
This weekend has easily been one of the most eventful since living here in Chester and most of the events took place in Liverpool! I would like to see Claire again if she'd like to see me but I don't think she'll want to. I'll keep texting her and trying to see if she wants to, but I really doubt it.
And in other girl news, it's Hannah's birthday on Wednesday and as I've said, I don't have her number. I bet you any money she will text me on Wednesday with something like "Why didn't you text me? It's my birthday" etc. The last time she text me was some time ten days ago or more. I have a credible reason for not texting her in the last ten days. What's hers? So, if she does text me with something like that, my reply to her will be along the lines of "Well, you've had 10 days to text me and you haven't once so it's obvious that you're not actually that bothered".
And that's my weekend adventure.
