After my previous entry, the weirdness continued with Larina and even though I tried not to say anything to her all night, she kept coming back to say a little more.
[23:50:11] Larina: what u doing?
[23:50:41] Heroes pay the price: Listening to music.
[23:50:53] Larina: and being angry with me
[23:51:53] Heroes pay the price: A little.
[23:54:06] Larina: u can be as pissed as u want with m
[23:54:07] Larina: *me
[23:54:17] Larina: i dont give a damm
[00:00:29] Larina: i didn't make u like me
[00:00:49] Larina: u chose to like me urself
[00:00:54] Larina: so thats ur prob
[00:00:57] Heroes pay the price: Ok
[00:01:04] Larina: u can't always have things ur way
[00:01:08] Larina: accept it
[00:01:13] Heroes pay the price: I have.
[00:57:52] Larina: still mad?
[00:58:13] Heroes pay the price: Frustrated
[01:18:01] You have successfully received H:StuffDocumentsMy Recieved Filesfets00502-117.jpg from Larina.
[01:18:09] Larina: it not me
[01:18:14] Heroes pay the price: I know it's not
[01:18:17] Heroes pay the price: Why are you sending me it?
[01:18:28] Larina: wondered if u like her?
[02:02:09] Larina: i'm going shortly not that you care
[02:02:20] I learn as I go. To float far away into silence. And just watch your face. And find some kind of grace in that quiet bliss...: Sweet dreams
[02:02:39] Larina: i will
[02:02:49] Larina: i doubt u'll be going bed for hours yet
[02:03:07] I learn as I go. To float far away into silence. And just watch your face. And find some kind of grace in that quiet bliss...: Probably not, no. I'll be here for a while.
[02:03:26] Larina: anything u wanna say whilest i'm being prevented from going by me ex?
[02:04:07] I learn as I go. To float far away into silence. And just watch your face. And find some kind of grace in that quiet bliss...: Nothing comes to mind right now.
[02:05:26] Larina: ok
[02:05:42] Larina: i take it ur gonna ust keep ignoring me from now on?
[02:05:47] I learn as I go. To float far away into silence. And just watch your face. And find some kind of grace in that quiet bliss...: No
[02:06:17] I learn as I go. To float far away into silence. And just watch your face. And find some kind of grace in that quiet bliss...: And I'm not ignoring you.
[02:06:23] I learn as I go. To float far away into silence. And just watch your face. And find some kind of grace in that quiet bliss...: I've answered you every time.
[02:38:30] Larina: what u doing?
[02:38:40] I learn as I go. To float far away into silence. And just watch your face. And find some kind of grace in that quiet bliss...: Listening to some orchestral music
[02:38:45] Larina: okies
And then this:
[02:54:45] Larina: neil?
[02:54:48] I learn as I go. To float far away into silence. And just watch your face. And find some kind of grace in that quiet bliss...: Yeah?
[02:55:14] Larina: u still want to meet u g.spirit?
[02:55:25] I learn as I go. To float far away into silence. And just watch your face. And find some kind of grace in that quiet bliss...: I do
[02:55:54] Larina: u wanna meet as normal? or postphone?
[02:56:15] I learn as I go. To float far away into silence. And just watch your face. And find some kind of grace in that quiet bliss...: I'd wanna do more than just talk with you.
[02:56:44] Larina: well i've sorted things with tony, and we're having a trial for an open relationship
Yes, she has a boyfriend. Apparantly though she sees other people. A little confusing, but part of me is actually hoping that I can somehow get her to go out with me instead. I think I'm being foolish with that.
She is referring to my "Guardian Spirit". She claims she can help me get introduced to mine. I'll be quite honest and say that I don't believe her and it's just a way to meet her, but still, I'm open minded enough to at least give it a go. However, look at that last line. Hours ago, she was insistent that she no longer wanted to meet me and that it was all my fault and that she was going to block me. Then she messaged me throughout the night. And now she's decided she wants to meet up afterall?
Weird.
I said yes. That makes me a bit gullible really doesn't it?
Before she had cancelled, our plan was to get a hotel room for the night and have some fun together. Sounded like a good idea. Then she cancelled of course and now it's back on.
So from around 3am, I've started talking to her again and we've been discussing what will happen and moreso, where it will happen. The hotel part was the issue. Which hotel and how close it was to her home, as she wouldn't be able to stay the night. However, throughout the conversation, even though the thought of spending a fair few hours with her was very very appealing, my morality was getting to me a lot. "This isn't right", it keeps saying, "This isn't right". And so, after around an hour of talking about what we're going to do to each other:
[03:58:07] I learn as I go. To float far away into silence. And just watch your face. And find some kind of grace in that quiet bliss...: See, I was thinking. I'm a nice guy. I'm not just interested in you because I want to fuck you. I like you as a person too. And because of that, I was wondering if you'd like to forget about the hotel thing and just spend a day in town talking and getting to know each other. And maybe at the end of the day when I have to come home, a long hug and a goodbye? :)
[04:00:23] Larina: but it has a fe complications
[04:00:28] I learn as I go. To float far away into silence. And just watch your face. And find some kind of grace in that quiet bliss...: Like what?
[04:00:34] Larina: as i'd have to go home for food etc..
[04:00:42] I learn as I go. To float far away into silence. And just watch your face. And find some kind of grace in that quiet bliss...: Why?
[04:00:49] Larina: well i need to eat
[04:00:59] Larina: i can have dinner b4 i come out
[04:01:00] I learn as I go. To float far away into silence. And just watch your face. And find some kind of grace in that quiet bliss...: Consider it all expenses paid.
[04:01:05] Larina: really?
[04:01:07] I learn as I go. To float far away into silence. And just watch your face. And find some kind of grace in that quiet bliss...: Yes
My conscience isn't shouting at me no more.
This feels much more...right. No hotel room, no sex. Just a day out in town together getting to know each other. Yes, I really want to jump into bed with her and the offer was there but I want to do it this way. The right way?
So, it looks like I'm meeting Larina after all.
